The Impeachment Hearing Room

Satire: John McCain Throws In The Towel For The Good Of The Nation! October 13, 2008  (Plus Heavy Weight Concerns Election 2008)

My Friends,

Over the past few days I have come to realize that my campaign for President has devolved into a national disgrace.  The negative campaign tactics I have unleashed are dangerously dividing our country while fueling religious and racial hatred along socio-economic lines.  In my ruthless attempt to win the Presidency at any cost I have abandoned any principles of decency I once had and am now only a shadow of my former self to everyone who knows me or thought they knew me, or once respected me.

Also I have come to realize that my unfair and disgustingly false attacks on Senator Obama's character, which were thinly disguised attempts to link him and his wife Michelle to Muslim terrorists, have been the last thing anyone who claims to be putting "Country First" would do.  And worse, I may have even placed him and his family in danger from the radical and dangerous extremists who now inhabit and infect the base of my party - a group I once denounced but decided I needed to vigorously cultivate by turning myself into a "flip-flopper" in order to win this election. I encourage my fellow Senators to file ethics charges against me for having done something so disgraceful like this.

Basically the energized base of the Republican party - a bunch of religious extremists -  only care about preventing abortion even in cases of rape or incest. My friends, they are even against stem cell research to cure diseases!  The bumper sticker of my base reads:  God, Guns, and Guts!  These people will mindlessly chant: USA!! USA!! USA!! at my rallies versus even attempting to understand the many serious issues facing our country in these troubling times.

In other words the base of the GOP that I need to get myself elected President consists of too many mindless nitwits and/or dangerous religious extremists and racists. 

That's why I thought I could stoke their fear and anger against Senator Obama to try and win this election.  It was a grave mistake and a very bad gamble on my part. My friends, the country has turned against this kind of politics and my polling numbers have plummeted. 

I realize I no longer have any chance of winning this election. Also I can no longer associate myself with "extremists" and fringe people like this and those who rally these kinds of nasty and ignorant people to support my campaign. Wealthy people like Cindy and myself would never have anything  to do with people like this if I weren't running for office. We really detest these clueless ignorant crackpots and most everything they stand for.

As an example of what I have unleashed: At recent rallies, supporters of mine have yelled out:  "Treason!",  "Terrorist!",  "Kill him!", "Bomb Obama!", and "Off with his head!" against Sen. Obama.  I have also heard these unhinged people yell out racial epithets. And now I regret not taking any stand against these kinds of outbursts at the moment they were uttered.  

My friends, I can no longer be a party to inciting my supporters to acts of vigilantism against Sen. Obama in order to try and win an election.  With our racially motivated slurs against Sen. Obama, Sarah and I helped to stoke these monsters and now we must do everything we can to distance ourselves from them in an attempt to tamp down their anger and rage.  That is why I am suspending my campaign for good. YES, WE CAN'T!

My friends, I have made many other mistakes in this campaign as well. The media, whom I have falsely and repeatedly accused of liberal bias to incite my base, correctly reported I wanted to pick my dear friend, Sen. Joe Lieberman, as my running mate. 

 Senator Lieberman and I both share the same imperialistic neocon views about using our military FIRST anywhere in the world to protect Israel's interests regardless of what it does to our own country when we act this way unilaterally based upon lies and fear.

But I realized that Sen. Lieberman's views on abortion would have cost me the base of my party and without that base I could not win.  So instead of doing the right thing and picking a well-respected and highly qualified person as my Vice President even if not Sen. Lieberman, I chose Sarah Palin. 

I therefore did not put "Country First". I picked Sarah Palin because I hoped to steal some votes from disaffected women supporters of Hillary Clinton. I should have known better.

Clinton supporters and most women have nothing in common with someone like Sarah Palin or her views. I also picked Sarah Palin because I was impulsive and thought I needed to do something dramatic to energize my stale campaign. I knew my base was naive and gullible enough to fall for Sarah Palin and they did!  To be fair, Sarah Palin only did what she was told.

The campaign knew we couldn't allow her or any of her family to speak to the media unscripted. We were quite fortunate the media never demanded much from Sarah Palin nor her family.  Instead they quickly found a way to turn the Palins into "C-grade celebrities"  to boost their ratings. This helped our campaign for a short time. But even that effort failed once Sarah's lack of curiosity and knowledge of issues was exposed. Now she and her family are of little use to this campaign.

So now it's time for the Palins to head home to Alaska.  Sarah needs to spend her time taking care of her Down's baby instead of using him as our campaign's right-to-life prop. Her younger children and teenage daughter also need to be back in school where they have belonged for over a month. Sarah needs to make sure her unwed teenage daughter Bristol receives better sex education counseling.

The family needs to make sure both older children get immediate drug counseling including their eldest son, Track who's in Iraq because he couldn't get into college. The Palin family have many serious family issues they should be dealing with instead of spending their time running for office.

Sarah will have all she can handle in Alaska to avoid being impeached for serious violations of state ethics laws. Obviously my campaign didn't vet Sarah Palin very well and this is yet another serious mistake my campaign has made. So the Palin family will be heading back to Alaska soon and I wish them well. You will just have to find another redneck dysfunctional family to satisfy your own weird entertainment needs.

During my campaign I also thought I could win with cheap sloganeering.  I figured all I needed to do was repeat the label "Maverick" enough times and people would think I was a different kind of politician and candidate than George Bush.  I was even foolish enough to believe I could steal Sen. Obama's message of "Change" and use it for myself. I actually thought that despite my long career in the House and Senate while supporting Bush almost 95% of the time, Americans would be dumb enough to believe I stood for change. How crazy was that? I owe the American people my sincerest apologies.

Also during my campaign I actually thought everyone understood why I had to associate with lowlifes, misfits, racists, homophobes, misogynists, and religious zealots in order to win the election.  Did anyone really think Cindy and I would ever invite a Sturgis, South Dakota motorcycle type crowd over to our Sedona estate for a BBQ? You've got to be kidding! 

My friends, I was way too old and decrepit and in unstable health to run for President. That's why I couldn't release all of my medical records and had troubling remembering things on the campaign.  This too reflected bad judgment on my part. 

I have attempted to describe some of the more serious blunders I have made in this campaign and the reasons for them. No candidate for President can make this many disastrous mistakes in a campaign and expect to win. Why?  Because it's a reflection of one's poor judgment.

No sane American should consider me qualified nor capable of holding high office and becoming your next President. The country cannot afford to have a President who doesn't demonstrate much better judgment than I have demonstrated during my entire life and more specifically this campaign. Nor should my reckless and careless decision-making during the campaign be rewarded by your vote for me.

So I wish to apologize to every American for what I have done to you and what I have subjected our country to during this campaign. I also wish to apologize to the Obama family for the viciousness of my attacks and lies.  Cindy and I will try and reimburse all of our supporters for any monies of yours we collected and spent post convention on this misguided campaign.

This is the only honorable thing to do even if we have to sell a few of our 8-11 houses and a most of our 13 cars or sell the stock in Cindy's beer distributorship worth well over $100 million or sell the company's plane we fly around in on Ebay .  Effectively and immediately I am suspending my campaign because I realize this is THE ONLY  way I can really put my COUNTRY FIRST.

Respectfully,

John McCain

[Sarah Palin has agreed with this decision because I told her to.]

By Michael Hammerschlag
A Question Of Judgment
McCain's judgment has been abysmal: he remained in a brutal NV prison for 4 1/2 years rather than go home. His economic advisor, "genius" Phil Gramm wrote the bills that exempted these junk bond derivatives from any regulation- creating this economic meltdown; McCain was a fervent backer of the catastrophic Iraq invasion; Cynical choice of the woefully unqualified Palin endangers nation: We questioned him on the first issue

SAN FRANCISCO, Oct. 13 /PRNewswire/ -- Cindy Sheehan, candidate for Congress, has gone public with her challenge to debate Nancy Pelosi in the race for San Francisco's 8th Congressional District.

"We've been asking for a debate with Pelosi for months now, and she’s ignored us," said Sheehan. "I'm ready to debate her at any time and at anyplace. From the economy and the war to the environment and education, voters have a right to know how the candidates purporting to represent them will manage the crucial challenges facing our country today." 

The campaign first formally invited Pelosi to a debate in September, but has yet to receive a response. Sheehan has also indicated her willingness to accommodate any date, format or location preferred by Pelosi. Sheehan’s campaign has also sent a similar invitation to the remaining candidates in the race -- Dana Walsh(R) and Phillip Berg(L). 

"Every day, my campaign receives inquiries from people about debates between the candidates," said Sheehan. "I demand that my opponent respect the electoral process and agree to at least one debate in a public forum. The people in this District deserve to know where she stands on the issues, and what she has been doing in Washington to represent their interests. The stakes are too high right now for her to do anything less." 

Sheehan's campaign has further indicated that, if Pelosi fails to respond, they will hold a debate on October 26 in San Francisco using video footage of Pelosi and her published statements to represent her opinions. 

Recent polls show that voters in California are growing increasingly disenchanted with Pelosi's performance in Washington. According to a May Field Poll, only 30% of California voters approved of Pelosi's performance, while39% disapproved. A Zogby poll, conducted from September 24 through September25, also shows that Pelosi has seen an 18% drop in voter support since California’s June primary. 

By Frank Murphy
Martial Law In The U.S.: Conspiracy Theory Or Reasonable To Discuss?
Discussion of strengths and weaknesses of the idea that "martial law" could be implemented in the U.S.

The End Of The Rule Of Law In America
US troops are back home in America to wage war upon the people of the US. New laws make public dissent of any kind --however peaceful --an act of 'terrorism'. Congress was threatened with martial law, literally blackmailed, into passing the infamous and ineffective bailout! The threat of martial law, therefore, is not only in the official record, it is made clear with the domestic use of US troops in American streets.

Time for change's Journal (A Must Read)
Democratic Underground - Washington,DC,USA
With the Bush/Cheney attack on our Constitution and their decision that neither the Geneva Conventions nor any other international law applied to their “War ...

http://www.rollingstone.com/news/story/23316912/makebelieve_maverick/print

MY GOD IS BIGGER THAN YOUR GOD

In case you missed it over the weekend, a minister who gave the invocation at a McCain rally in Iowa couched his prayer in terms I've never heard before: God's ownreputation is at stake in this election, he said, because so many Muslims, Hindus and Buddhists around the world are praying for an Obama victory that if Obama wins, they'll think "their god is bigger" than the Christian god.

Pastor at McCain Rally: God Must Ensure McCain Win

It conjures up bad Japanese movies, or the fanciful musings of 10-year-old boys. Who would win between King Kong and Godzilla? Between Allah and Vishnu? Does the Christian god have an unfair advantage because he's three in one? His "theological" take also suggests some influences from Greek mythology, but instead of angry gods hurling lightning bolts at one another, they're trying to throw an election one way or the other, which is almost post-modern in its own way.

Palin Says McCain Will End "Abuses Of Power" -- Despite Report Saying She "Abused Her Power"

By Greg Sargent - October 13, 2008, 12:32PM

Warming up the crowd for John McCain in Virginia Beach today, Sarah Palin said:

See, as a senator, John has confronted the corrupt ways of Washington and the wasteful spending and the abuses of power.As president, he's gonna end those once and for all.

Today of all days is an odd one for Palin to claim that McCain-Palin will end "abuses of power" in Washington, since the first line of the findings section of theTroopergate report released on Friday said...

For the reasons explained in section IV of this report, I find that Governor Sarah Palin abused her power by violating Alaska Statute 39.52.110(a) of the Alaska Executive Branch Ethics Act.

Whoever didn't cut that line from her speech today is either incompetent or very, very brazen. Special thanks to TPM Reader BR for the catch.

The 35 Articles of Impeachment and the Case for Prosecuting George W. Bush

by Congressman Dennis Kucinich
With Additional Material by David Swanson and Elizabeth de la Vega

http://feralhouse.com/titles/images/BushImpeachment.pdf

True Patriotism (Obama) v. the False/Dangerous Rhetoric of Perfection and Infallibility

October 13, 2008, 1:17PM

I know this is a bit philosophical at a critical juncture of the election, but I had to get this off my chest, because I actually think this is relevant to the flames Sarah Palin is trying to fan when she speaks of "Barack Obama is someone who views America as imperfect ..." and tries to contrast it with her notion of a Perfect America serving as the shining city on a hill.

This notion of perfection and American infallibility is one of the most dangerous, misguided notions out there and it is to our serious detriment as Americans. In truth, it is a tool of oppression that has been used by radical dictatorial regimes in the past and is now being used by the right wing politicians in the present in America. It is an oppressive tool that equates and conflates this ridiculous and demonstrably false notion of perfection with Patriotism and then tries to bully, ostracize, and suppress anyone that dares question this thinking or the policies of America's leaders as unpatriotic. In this world, everything is simplified and painted in a "you're with us or against us" or "good guys v. bad guys" picture. If you question or assign fault to anything that the country has done or any policy that the country has implemented, you're being unpatriotic, emboldening enemies, and questioning America.

This is the kind of radical notion that oppresses critical thinking and progress, that enables, rationalizes and tacitly approves misguided or unjustified wars, hideous acts of torture, abandonment of communal or global principles and treaties. It's all done under the self-serving guise that it's ok because it's in our immediate national interests; that it's ok because we know what's right and wrong and when we can tell when we can't afford to abide by old norms in times of crisis; and that ultimately we shouldn't question it or worry because America is doing it - and that because we all know and agree that a America is a great country - we should know that it wouldn't anything wrong or do something "seemingly wrong" unless it was absolutely necessary.

We've seen this playbook followed to script in the Bush/Cheney years. Anyone that questioned the start or the conduct of the Iraq war, American policies of torture and rendition, American abandonment of global treaties, etc. was branded and demonized as unpatriotic, defeatist, and as emboldening the enemies/ terrorists. We're seeing this playbook again with McCain and Palin. McCain uses much of it in his discussion of foreign policy and Palin's entire worldview can be summed up by this theory (I wish I was kidding - listen to her speeches). She uses it in all her rhetoric.

Once you take a step back - the danger of this is and should be clear. Not only does it polarize and divide Americans, but it antagonizes, incites violence, and suppresses rational critical thinking that would lead to better discourse and informed judgments.

But most importantly - it is the exact opposite of patriotism and the foundations of America which we all love. To be patriotic is to love one's country - not to view it as perfect. To be patriotic is to always strive for ways to make America an even better country, even if that means voicing dissent. The key to patriotism is upward, forward and organic. It is to commit yourself to loving and supporting your country and working toward that cause if it's being derailed. Not to abandon it, criticize it (without action) or to blindly and uncritically adhere to what is currently happening.

Bush, Cheney, McCain and Palin have it exactly wrong. America is not perfect in practice, and history has boundless examples of things we've done wrong - whether it be slavery, torture, camps in WWII, female suppression, etc. But the beauty and the perfection in America lies in that its democratic structure and its ideals of free speech enable us to question our policies, denounce bad practices, and ultimately change direction toward a more perfect democratic union.

Don't you see - that's why the constitution has checks and balances, freedom of speech and the free press; that's why it allows for impeachment and an amendment process; that's why we have elections. It is to enable us to constantly strive for perfection and betterment. It is to allow us to have discourse, dissent and critical thinking.

This is one of the things I most love about Obama's speeches. He gets the beauty of America. he understands what our founders understood when they set out to create a governmental structure that would help us "form a more perfect union". As he said in the historic speech about race or in his acceptance speech (really worth the read:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/03/18/obama-race-speech-read-t_n_92077.html-

It’s not that we're perfect, it's that we love this country and its ideals so that we can realize and overcome our imperfections and continuously strive for a more perfect union. That's the kind of leader he wants to be. That's the kind of leader that allows for diverse viewpoints to inform his judgment. That's the kind of leader that won't make rash impulsive decisions. That's the kind of leader that transcends bitter political divides and brings people together. That's the kind of leader that has his eyes on the actual prize - the betterment of America as opposed to tending to self-serving immediate goals, seeing himself as an elected leader obligated only to reward those who voted for him, or his lobbyists, or the military industrial complex.

That's the kind of leader that understands we can only serve as that shining city on a hill, not by blindly calling ourselves infallible and plowing ahead with policies determined to unilaterally expand our power, but by setting an example that understands and respects humanity for all its components - its fallible and delicate nature, its good intentions, and its desire for finding a way to prosper amidst a peaceful existence. In short, America recognized the desire and embodied the ability to organize civilized institutions that would and could be greater than the sum of our parts and would enable us to recognize, overcome and transcend our own faults and prejudices and our collective mistakes to better ourselves as a society.

Now - that is patriotism.

By David Schultz
Marx, Globalization, And The Death Of Neo-Liberalism
The western banking crisis is an historic event on two counts. First it demonstrates that Karl Marx is again relevant and that his analysis of capitalist society is not quite ready for the dustbin of history. Second, state intervention to save the banks and the free market from itself undermine whatever remaining legitimacy there is in the intellectual foundations of neo-liberalism.

By Bill Wetzel
Paul Krugman Wins Nobel Prize. GOP Accuses Facts Of Having "librul Bias."
A satirical look at the response to the Nobel Prize in economics being awarded to Princeton economist and NY Times columnist, Paul Krugman.